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Old 08-22-2010, 05:58 PM View Post #1 (Link) Hello from Kendallina
MidnightAngel17 (Offline)
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Hi, my name is kendallina and i am new too the site. I am 17 and love too write stories and poetry. i am a artist and skater and my favorite band is tokio hotel. Anything else you wanna know just ask.
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Old 08-22-2010, 06:01 PM View Post #2 (Link)
Alice Glitterhorn (Offline)
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Please remember to capitalize your "I"s. And your name. And names of bands. Check your grammar as well.

WELCOME.
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Spoiler:
Originally Posted by Caleb
when I hear the word poet

I think of you naked, rimbaud drinking, and how lovely my hair is


They sailed away, for a year and a day,
To the land where the bong-tree grows;
And there in a wood a Piggy-wig stood,
With a ring at the end of his nose,

Word Count: 10000/50000
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Old 08-22-2010, 06:18 PM View Post #3 (Link)
lostbookworm (Offline)
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WELCOME! Also, check out theses two links.
Crit Guidlines:http://www.youngwritersonline.net/critiques.php
Rules and FAQs:http://www.youngwritersonline.net/rules.php
And do capatilise. It's a big thing here. Nice to meet you!
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and he saw himself nailed to the cross of his own cradle and coffin
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Old 08-22-2010, 06:36 PM View Post #4 (Link)
Rose (Offline)
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Originally Posted by MidnightAngel17 View Post
Hi, my name is Kendallina and I am new too to the site. I am 17 and I (Flows better with an "I". ) love tooto write stories and poetry. I am a ("an" not "a") artist and a skater and my favorite band is Tokio Hotel. (I think it's supposed to be: I am an artist, a skater, and my favorite band is Tokio Hotel.) Anything else you wanna knowcomma just ask.
Man, that was fun. xD

That was a line-by-line crit.

Anyway, as Kyle [lostbookworm] and Alice [AliceGriffin] mentioned before, make sure to use proper grammar, spelling, punctuation, capitalization, ect...

Also, please check out the FAQ & Rules as well as the Critique Guidelines.

Lastly, if you still have any questions or if you need extra info/critiques, feel free to refer back to any member here (or any colored member) for help.

Have fun, and hope you enjoy your stay here.
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Das ist das ende


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Old 08-22-2010, 06:45 PM View Post #5 (Link)
Schooner (Offline)
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Welcome

What sort of things do you like to write about?
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George: "That's pie country. They do a lot of baking up there."

Jerry: "They sell them by the side of the road. Blueberry blackberry."

George: "Blackberry boysenberry."

Jerry: "Boysenberry huckleberry."

George: "Huckleberry raspberry."

Jerry: "Raspberry strawberry."

George: "Strawberry cranberry."

Jerry: "Peach."
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Old 08-22-2010, 07:08 PM View Post #6 (Link)
lostbookworm (Offline)
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Originally Posted by Rose View Post

Anyway, as Kyle [lostbookworm] and Alice [AliceGriffin] mentioned before, make sure to use proper grammar, spelling, punctuation, capitalization, ect...
Yes, I beat you! Please don't kill me...
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and he saw himself nailed to the cross of his own cradle and coffin
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Old 08-22-2010, 07:10 PM View Post #7 (Link)
Rose (Offline)
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Originally Posted by lostbookworm View Post
Yes, I beat you! Please don't kill me...
Why would I kill you? You're my lil' bro.
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Das ist das ende


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Old 08-22-2010, 07:15 PM View Post #8 (Link)
lostbookworm (Offline)
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Originally Posted by Rose View Post
Why would I kill you? You're my lil' bro.

I thought you had a terrible wrath, and would kill me for taking your job introducing people... I'm not dead!
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and he saw himself nailed to the cross of his own cradle and coffin
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Old 08-22-2010, 07:26 PM View Post #9 (Link)
Majyk (Offline)
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Originally Posted by lostbookworm View Post
I thought you had a terrible wrath, and would kill me for taking your job introducing people... I'm not dead!
I'll kill both of you. It was my job before Rose started stealing it, and now you're trying to take it, too.


Anyway, welcome to YWO! Please do watch your capitalization and grammar, as this is a writing site. Also, do check out the rules and critique guidelines that you've been shown. And if you have any questions, feel free to ask.
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A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.
Albert Einstein


.
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Old 08-22-2010, 08:34 PM View Post #10 (Link)
ManyIdeas (Offline)
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Welcome to YWO, hope you find the site usefull
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"Something here doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."- The Doctor
"Yes, before you ask, I like Matt Smith!"
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