Banned from Writing?

[appleofmyeye]

Alright, I've had yet another shot filled day, and I'm about to go crazy if I don't blah about it. Today, my mom told me I need to 'start living in the real world'. She took all the FF games I bought for my birthday. I'm not whining about that though. She also disaproves of 'that freaky anime shit'. Ergo, she's confiscated all my manga/dvds. Not just that, ALL OF MY BOOKS.the only ones she left were the ones for English class so i'd be sure to only read school aproved material. And she has made it quite clear she disaproves of my writing as I use it 'to escape reality and live out my fantasies'. I don't understand why that's bad, just because she has the imagination of a toothpic I have to suffer. Not like I can write anymore seeing as my 1000 dollar MacBook is in a pool now (and no, I didn't drop it in). Anyway, just wanted to let you know you should be happy your parents aren't Nazis.

[Bowie20049]

You should give them the definition of Fascism.

[Shaun]

I'm a bit in shock about this, apple. I really am. This is so...insane it defies logic...

By the way, I hate your mother. This is a horrible thing and I suggest you give her hell for it. I wouldn't take that sitting down. You haven't got much else to lose anyway...she can't take away your homework...

This pisses me off...

[Carraka]

That sucks! I've been saving up a voodoo doll for this special occasion. I think my friends expected me to use it on a teacher, but I knew there was a better victim.

Words Shaun did not put in my mouth:

What the --

Yes, that makes no sense at all. Your mother is the one that's not living in reality.

...

You know your parents better than I, but if there's a way to demonstrate your responsibility and maturity, without sacrificing your humanity, do it. Buy a calendar, and count the days until you can get out. Until then, keep those notebooks close to your heart.

[ScottyMcGee]

http://i152.photobucket.com/albums/s185/ScottyMcGee/picard-palm-faceL-6-192570-13.jpg

[Gabby]

That really sucks! My parents encourage my writing, and when my dad found out that was writing, I could tell he was excited. This is just stupid! And I'm really mad O_o This isn't right and I agree with Shaun. Tell her that it's your life, not her's. Tell her your writing is your dream!

[Diocletian]

Heh.

[Bowie20049]

I chuckled when they said, escaping reality.

[Shaun]

Here's one thing I don't understand: Why can't you pursue "realistic" goals while maintaining your identity as a writer? I mean, you can go to college, get a degree, get a "normal" job and still write. Terry Brooks was a lawyer before he became a full-time fantasy writer. There are plenty of examples of writers who began as something else and then became professional writers. And there are plenty of examples of folks who do something completely unrelated to writing, and yet still publish books and short stories. Writing literally has nothing whatsoever to do with averting reality. It's just...something some people do. It's not about avoiding the real world, it's about having fun, doing something you are passionate about.

Does your mother not understand that? Have you explained to her that writing is important, but that it's not preventing you from doing other things in life? Or is there a reason why she's flipping out? Grades slipping, drugs, what? I don't think it's any of those, but it just seems so absurd what she is doing. There's no rationality to it.

Meh. And anime isn't creepy. It's just different, and it is entirely valid and fascinating as an art form...

[lango]

Well, anime and videogames are usually things only accepted by parents if they enjoy it too. Never heard of a parent liking anime though...
But yeah, usually parents wrongly blame what you like due to something that either you're lacking, or they wish you had. Do you go out much, have a big social life and the such? Some parents, the ones who went out much on their teens find it strange when their offsprings are a "home" type of person and try to change it by banning whatever it is their kids like to do at home. Some also get concerned when they think their kids are watching TOO MUCH anime/using the comp for WAY TOO LONG (both measures differ a lot from parent to parent. Some parents think 8 hours a day is too much. Other thinks 1-2 hours a day is over the top). But as long as your grades are going fine, your friends (be it 1 or 1000 of them) are ok, your family knows youre normal, then there's no real reason for the parents to complaint, is there? Of course your way of living will be different then theirs. THEIR way of living was probably very different from their parents'. But who knows... some parents are not satisfied with what they have, they'd rather scold you for doing drugs/getting pregnant than scold you for watching anime, because anime ain't as common as the other two.

End of random rant :D

[appleofmyeye]

Thank you for all the support guys, I apreciate it :). I want to make this clear, I love my mom even though she is completely stubborn, irrational, and has a bad temper. And she loves me, but doesn't understand me nor does she want to (yes, I know that's what every teen thinks :rolleyes:.). She really wants me to be the perfectly normal child that makes good grades and is popular, ect. My brother is Aspbergers so that's a lost cause so I'm her only hope at being a sucsessful parent (messed up as it is). She is also afraid I'll end up autistic which is NOT the case. Along with that, unfortunately, my grades have slipped. I really don't understand why, I'm hoping it is just my add worsening and it can be helped with a pill. Or I'm just not as smart as I was I guess :(. I understand she's trying to find the cause but it still is a bit extreme. So I'll be here... posting through text on my iPod... sigh.

(Oh, and as for anime my mom is convinced it is all porn :P. We were in fye shopiing, and well, anyone who has been in that aisle will understand how awkward it is picking out a DVD with a parent reading the labels of the hentai above, heh.)

[Bowie20049]

ahahaha. That's why I watch all my anime on youtube. My mom actually ADMITTED she didn't want to understand me and the fact that I have the best grades out of my brothers make me really irritated. Good luck on your struggle xD.

[ScottyMcGee]

Well, anime and videogames are usually things only accepted by parents if they enjoy it too. Never heard of a parent liking anime though...


My mother likes anime! :D

[Lykaios]

I don't know what to say.

My mum's banned me from the computer and she doesn't like me spending all my money on books, but she has never stopped me from doing what I like. My dad and my aunt are the only people who've moaned at me. I don't know what my dad would think if he knew I still write. He told meI'd grow out of it eventually, but I don't live with him so his opinions don't have much effect. My aunt once moaned about the amount I read, saying it was unhealthy and I shouldn't use it as 'escapeism' but I don't live with her either, so she can keep moaning.

You could always try pretending to be really depressed around your mum (guilt-trip?) or get your teacher for English/Art to write her a letter about how developing reading a writing skills are important and that expressing oneself through different art forms . . . blah-blah. She might look on it differently if a teacher said it?

[jordanisonfire]

If I were you, I'd get revenge. I do for whatever my parents do to me that I deem bad, even if its something that's perfectly understandable. And I have fun thinking up ways to do it. :D But obviously, that way isn't for everyone.

My parents are aware that I write... at least, I think so. I was a very avid writer as a kid and they read what I wrote (which I'm embarrassed about now, because it was almost certainly terrible :D) and I've never expressed an interest in stopping. As for me reading manga, I don't tell them about that. They wouldn't ban me from doing it, they'd just think it'd be weird for a 16-year-old to be reading comic books.

[Shaun]

Lykaios, your aunt thinks that amount you read is unhealthy? Would you be offended if I said your aunt is a complete moron who barely has the braincells to breathe? I mean, come on...that's ridiculous. If you watched TV all the time with your face literally glued to the screen, I might understand it, but this is reading...it's good for your brain. Yeesh. No wonder illiteracy is so prevalent in this country...

[Lykaios]

Shaun - the ironic thing is, that she's a journalist and knows that as well as we do. :rolleyes: She just says I shouldn't use it as escapism and should live in the real world, and that translates to her as 'don't read'. It sucks. I get a lecture every christmas and summer about it, as well as what I read. She judges books by their covers and only the ones with 'pretty things' on them pass her 'apropriate reading list'. I laugh afterwards though because it's so ridiculous. :P

[Starry]

My mom thinks the amount of stuff I read is ridiculous, but that's only because she thinks fantasy has no literary merit whatsoever. But this is a separate issue.

My mom actually encourages my writing because she thinks that if I get published sometime soon, it will look good to colleges (I'm a junior, so it's kind of spazz out about colleges time starting). So maybe mentioning that wil be helpful? In addition to writing really helping your school-writing abilities as well.

[Shaun]

You people have sucky parents. Granted, I didn't have great parents either, but still...

[Fiction]

Why are parents trying to crush their children's writing? It is a beautiful gift that not everyone has. What is with your mother, anyway?

[Shaun]

I'm not sure what it is, Fictionwise, but it does seem rather common...unfortunately.

[Gabby]

Ha! Maybe they're jealous because they wish they could write. (somehow I doubt that)

[Rouge]

Uhm, this is the most terrible thing I've ever heard. It's completely absurd.

My mom is okay with my writing, though she doesn't understand a lot of it, and she's thankful that I'd rather spend money on books rather than video games. x.x
However, I'm sure she probably wouldn't want me to take it up as a career because she wants me to be successful -- though if you write anything like Twilight you're sure to be a multi-billionaire, and that's way more lucrative than being a Psychologist.
However, I don't intend for writing to be my career anyways, and I guess, since she knows it, she doesn't care. She tries to stay out of my life when it comes to my networking.
;__; I'm sad that your mom isn't the same way. . . really really sad.


And, hey, Death Note and Spiral are two of the most intelligent shows I've ever watched and they're both anime. That's a load of bullshit, anime being creepy. Anime boys are sexy. :mellow:

Apple, I'm sad for you. -hugs-

By the way, who 'dropped' your MacBook into the pool?

[Bowie20049]

My Dad is actually hoping I would take writing as a career. Basically because he doesn't know anything I specialize in. xD

[Carraka]

Well, I know my mother internally crushes her instinct to crush me because we are living in Amellica. Also, my dad would disapprove of the crushing, so yay for him.

But the reasons she would not want me to become a novelist is because you have a low chance of getting published and even after you're published, you might not even be that successful. You'll write and edit for hours and hours, and in the end you're at the mercy of these reading people. And people don't even read anymore.

So she's scared. She has images of me wandering through the streets in rags, homeless yet still scribbling away in my notepad, refusing to relinquish my dreams.

It all boils down to happiness. Surely I'd be happier if I were a doctor or at least something with a steady paycheck.

Now that she's learned I'm realistic enough to expect getting a second job and everything, I think the whole novelist thing is much easier to bear.

[Elvenscholar]

This whole scenario really bites.
Maybe you just need to talk to her and explain how important writing is to you, and that you still have real friends and a real life and have every intention of getting a job and being responsible. Writing is simply an outlet for your creativity, and you should explain that to her.
(Sorry if anybody else has said the exact same thing)

[Simmi]

That really stinks. My parent's don't react that way to my writing. Unless you count the time I wrote a story that was "dark" they were acting as if I'd become like Stephen King -.- Which was kind of good and bad, because they didn't want me to be known for only writing dark stories, but he's a successful writer so... yeah. But my mom knows I want to be a psychologist, and how I actually help my friends with their problems, or listen to them I should say. She knows I watch anime and disapproves of the Yaoi stuff... but is fine with the rest of it.

Like all the others are saying, it might be because of her insecurity. She might think you're gonna be a hobo on the street, just writing. And stealing video games and anime/manga to watch/read. Or that you're slipping in something.

I just reiterated everything everyone said... dang it!

[Jack]

Damn. This pisses me off so much I cannot put it into words.

[oryn]

That is the most horrible thing I've ever heard!!! This kind of thing just makes me so angry!!! Alright, your parents aren't just Nazis - they're fascist mental patients who belong to every insane right wing radical group EVER. I'm sorry if that offends.

I have a friend who has a similar problem, though it mostly pertains to reading (her parents don't let her read fiction unless it's for English class - and they're like overly-protective religious nuts so they don't let her read stuff that involves magic or mythical creatures because they're 'from the devil'). It's things like this that make me happy that my parents aren't like that... maybe my dad isn't as supportive as I'd like, but he and my mom both encourage my writing like crazy. I feel insanely sorry for you. So so so so sorry!

[Bowie20049]

Ha. Suddenly being a righty is an insult. I'm leftist myself.